When jokes
You're so ugly that when you walk past the toilet, it flushes itself.
When orphans go to school, they can’t get parent pickup.
When you throw your peanut butter sandwich at the nut allergy table: 25+ kill streak!
Yesterday I asked an emo girl if she's jealous when her phone dies.
An African man was walking in New York when he saw a sign that said, "Watch out for children."
He started laughing hysterically, then a white man asked him, "Why are you laughing?"
He said, "In Africa, they would never put up a sign like that."
So, Little Johnny's teacher is warned at the beginning of the school year not to ever make a bet with Johnny unless she is absolutely sure she will win it. One day in class, Johnny raises his hand and says, "Teacher, I'll bet you $50 I can guess what color your underwear is." She replies, "Okay, meet me after class and we'll settle it." But before class ends, she goes to the restroom and removes her panties. After class is over and the students clear out, Johnny makes his guess. "Blue." "Nope. You got it wrong," she says as she lifts her skirt to reveal she isn't wearing any underwear. "Well, come with me out to my dad's car, he's waiting for me, and I'll get you the money." She follows him out. When they get to the car, she informs his dad that he got the bet wrong and that she showed Johnny that she wasn't wearing any underwear. His dad exclaims: "That mother fucker! He bet me $100 this morning that he'd see your pussy before the end of the day!"
What do you get when you cross a priest with a toilet?
Holy shit.
Zion is so big, when he walks it's an earthquake.
Zion's so fat, when he walks, he breaks his mama's back.
I would roast you, but the mirrors do when you look at them.
When you look in the mirror, the mirror cracks.
When you step on the weighing scale, it shows your phone number!
Dark humor is like cancer, it's funnier when children get it.
When someone got the ghost in them, sound in the Priest Busters.
When something strange and it ain't no who you gonna call? Priest Busters.
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
Me: Why do you need to use shampoo when you are already bald? 🤣
Yo mama so fat, when she sat on the roof of a Walmart, it lowered the prices.
When I was a little boy, I had this dream. I was eating a giant marshmallow.
When I woke, I was being sexually abused.
Cancer is like your dad. It only comes back when Blueface baby drops a new album.
I was on the Official Cristiano Ronaldo website when suddenly my Anti-Virus software showed an alert on my screen! The notification read "WARNING: FRAUD DETECTED!" I was shocked but not surprised.
Penaldo has been finished for years after all, and he often ghosts in big games.