Whats jokes
What do you call a chair with a hat?
I don't know; the real question is, why was the chair wearing a hat?
What did the skeleton play when he joined the band?
A tromBONE.
What did the stop sign say to the street sign when he couldn't read a map?
"Can you give me some pointers?"
Velcro, what a rip-off!
Stormtrooper: What should I do with this guide for my test?
Palpatine: Review it.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh f-i-s-h (and the eye).
What do Marie Antoinette and 2005-2012 Korn have in common?
They're both Headless.
What did the mermaid wear for math class?
Algaebra.
What do you think of your mom? I have to go now and tyyyytt.
What do you call Flapple asleep? A Napple.
Me: Hey Joe, updog.
Joe: What?
Me: Updog.
Joe: What's updog?
*Facepalms*
Me: Lol in the corner.
What did the pencil say to the other pencil?
Your looking sharp!
What did the stepdad say to the flower? You're grounded!
What do bubbles get when they’re sick?
The suds.
What do you call a hippopotamus that stands out from the crowd?
A hipster!
What is baseball?
What is a good night for you?
What comes next in the pattern: ottffs?
So I walk into Orchids Of Asia. I come out three minutes later with the best massage of my life. What's the catch? Aye, there, matey, the catch of the day be crabs.
The QUEEN is JACK! KING off the JOKER!
I know what you're thinking, pervert. Actually, the joke's about a jester in drag. OK, I’m joking, the Queen cheated on the King with the Jester.