Whats jokes
What's an orphan's favorite flower?
Self-raising flour.
What is a Mexican's only obstacle?
Border patrol.
Me: U know the show called Imagine Dragons?
Friends: No, what is it?
Me: Imagine dragon this nuts across yo mouth.
What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?
They both came from behind and crushed them.
What do a blonde and a doorknob have in common?
Everyone gets a turn ;)
Teacher: Alright kids. 50, 49, 48, 47. What comes before 47?
Kid: AK!
Everyone else: 🚪 🏃🏾♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏾♀️🏃🏽🏃🏿🏃🏿🏃🏿♀️ 🎒 🏃🏻
What do you call an army of autistic people with guns?
Special forces.
What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"
What's the difference between a screw and a hooker? You can't unscrew the hooker.
If you're going shopping at school, what color would I like to smell: True or False?
What did the orphan's friend give him for his birthday?
Lego, so he can build a home.
What do you call two redheads on Mars?
Locals.
What's the difference between a Palestinian and a redneck?
At least the redneck was drunk when he married his cousin.
What do you call a gay scientist? Stephen Hawqueen.
What did the cancer cell say to its neighbor?
"Mind if I join you?"
What's black and never works?
Decaffeinated coffee, you racist bastard!
What does a 90 year old's pussy taste like?
Depends...
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What did the panther say at the poker party?
I'd be lion if I said I was a cheetah.
I remember when I was at a funeral at the age of 6. I was with my grandma and asked, "Grandma, Grandma, why is that man in a box?"
And she says, "He's in a better place now." I look at her confused and ask, "What kind of box did he live in before?! How is this box better than the last one?! It's just a box!"
And to this day I am still not allowed to go to funerals.