Whats jokes
What do you call an Asian receptionist?
Tai Ping.
What turns red, blue then white? The last person that I'd strangle.
What is the difference between a preschool and my basement?
Little kids leave preschool.
What does a wizard say when doing drugs? Injecto Patronum!
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.
Kid: "Hey dad, what's dark humor?"
Dad: "Go walk up to that homeless guy and throw a rock at him."
Kid: "But dad, I don't have any legs or arms."
Dad: "Exactly, son."
What's the difference between a priest and acne? At least acne waits til the boy is 12 to come on his face.
What's the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
What's the difference between my dad and a hooker?
Hookers come back.
Teacher: Kids, what are some things you have that make you happy? Kid 1: I have my family to make me happy. Kid 2: I have my friends to make me happy. Teacher: What about you, Sean? Sean: I have to take pills to make me happy...
What is a kidnapper’s favorite shoe?
White Vans.
What’s black, white, and red? A nun that fell down a 100 flight of stairs.
What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her!
What does a cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend?
He wipes his ass.
I was in cooking class and my teacher said, "Does anyone know what a chopping board is similar to?"
Me and my friend just glanced at each other and burst out laughing.
Long story short, the teacher understood the joke, and now we are both in daily therapy. 😭💀
What's a depressed person's favorite drink?
Depresso espresso.
Nah, just kidding, it's bleach.
Father: "Son, you were adopted."
Son: "What?! I knew it! I want to meet my biological parents!"
Father: "We are your biological parents. Now pack up, the new ones will pick you up in 20 minutes."
Q: What did one emo kid say to the other emo kid?
A: Wanna hang out?
What does it mean when a man has a dodgy past? It means he has skeletons in his closet.
What does it mean when a man likes Lana Del Rey better than Ed Sheeran? It means he has a closet full of women's leather pants (but no women in their dating history).
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.
What's a suicidal person's favorite game?
Hangman.