Whats jokes
What did the parent say to M.J.?
"Get off my kid!"
Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?
Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.
Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!
Stacy: lol
If Mississippi bought Virginia a New Jersey, what would Delaware?
Idaho... Alaska!
What’s the most terrifying word in nuclear physics?
Oops!
A weasel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never seen a weasel before. What can I get you?”
“Pop,” goes the weasel.
Ok, @loserispro This simple action took me a while to perform, what do you think?
What did the tree say to the depressed kid?
"Stop hanging around."
What do they call Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson's son? The Pebble.
What do you say when Jack's late to sex ed?
"Aye-jack-you-late!"
What do you say if you want to borrow your black sister's foundation? "Got any lighter shades?"
Beethoven composed his whole life.
What did he do in the afterlife? He decomposed! Har har har har har har.
What do you call a pregnant slave?
Buy 1 get 1 free.
What is Saturn's favorite movie?
Lord of the Rings.
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
Correctly spelled.
What is King Kong for dinner?
Humans.
What kind of shells do tanks use to cheat?
A-cheat shells.
Me: Hey! Look at my drawing of deez!
My babysitter: Very nice! But, uh, what’s deez?
Me: (¬‿¬)
What do a mole and an eagle have in common?
They live underground, except for the eagle. Lol.
What is Osama bin Laden's favorite game?
Hide and seek.
A: What do you call a sophisticated American? B: Canadian.
A: Why aren't there any Mexicans in Canada? B: They can't run that far.
«A: Что вы называете искушенным американцем? Б: Канадец.
A: Почему в Канаде нет ни одного мексиканца? Б: Они не могут убежать так далеко».
What do you call a deer with no ear?
One ear.