Whats jokes

Three guys are stranded with cannibals on an island. The cannibals said, "Each one of you come back with 10 pieces of fruit and shove them up your butt showing no emotion." The first guy came back with 10 apples, and by the second one, he started to grunt, so he was killed and eaten.

The second one came back with cherries, and when he went to put the 10th one in, he started to laugh, so he was killed and eaten. The two guys met in heaven, and the first guy said, "Dude, you were so close. What happened?" The second one said, "I would have made it, but I saw the third guy come back with 10 pineapples!!" 😝😝🤣🤣

It's not that I don't get the laugh, but most of you need to read through what's already been posted, 'cause everybody's saying the same sh*t.

What do you call a dog with no legs?

My asian neighbors dinner.

What's the second to last letter in the alphabet? Y. Cause I wanted to know.

What does Madeleine McCann and my old Xbox have in common?

They both died with red rings.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

The apple gets picked.

You know what’s impossible?

Steven Walking.

What kind of star would go to jail?

A shooting star!

Me walking in to the office:

Principal: Tell me, what did you do?

Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was an end portal...

What do kidnappers and Mickey Mouse have in common? They say, "Come inside, it’s fun inside."

What happened when the semicolon broke grammar laws?

It was given two consecutive sentences.

What's the last thing emos feel before they die? Rope burn.

Q: What is the difference between a drunk and a stoner at a stop sign?

A: The drunk guy runs it and the stoner waits for it to turn green!

Lil Timmy and Lil Susie are taking a bath together. Lil Susie looks down and says, "Hey, what's that?" Lil Timmy looks down and says, "Oh, that, that's only my little red race car." They continue on with their bath.

Then Lil Timmy looks down and says, "Hey, what's that?" Lil Susie looks down and says, "Oh, that, that's only my little red race car garage." They continue with their bath. Then Lil Susie says, "Hey, what if we try to put your little red race car in my little red race car garage?"

The parents downstairs then hear a bloody scream. They rush upstairs and then say, "What's wrong?" Lil Susie says, "Well, Lil Timmy tried to put his little red race car in my little red race car garage but the back wheels wouldn't fit, so we cut them off."

What do you call a knight in a cannibal village? -- Canned food.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What gets louder as it gets smaller?

A baby in a trash compactor.

What is the difference between light and hard? You can go to sleep with a light on.

What's white and bloody?

Two doves in a trash compactor. Talk about a failed marriage.

What do you call milk that gets everything she wants?

Spoiled milk.