What to gift a child molester who already has everything? A bigger county with more believers.
Whats Jokes
Q: What is the difference between a dead body and an orphan?
A: The dead body had a family.
Chinese Names - Annie Wan (Anyone)
Caller: "Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?"
Operator: "Yes, you can speak to me."
Caller: "No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!"
Operator: "You are talking to someone! Who is this?"
Caller: "I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent."
Operator: "I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?"
Caller: "Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no one) was involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one) got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital."
Operator: "Look, if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious, but I don't have time for this!"
Caller: "You are so rude! Who are you?"
Operator: "I'm Saw Lee (Sorry)."
Caller: "Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!"
What do you call a white duck?
A quacker.
What does a freshly pregnant teen and her baby share?
They both think, "Mom's probably going to kill me."
Teacher: Your bag is heavy, what's in there?
Weird Kid: Magazines.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
"Our souls will rain forever."
What does a bird say when it gets sick?
I flu!
What do birds use to check their grades?
Air-ies...
What did the cow say to the fat pig?
Moooooooove over!
What do you call a cow that no one likes? The mooser.
What flowers are on your face?
What type of teacher doesn't fart in public?
A private tutor/tooter.
What is the difference between whores and nuns?
Nuns usually discover their own chosen vocation. Whores usually have their vocation chosen by pimps.
What is the difference between Princess Diana and my laptop?
When my laptop crashes, I give a s**t.
What's so funny about toilet paper? The toilet aspect!
What animal is best at hitting baseballs?
A bat.
My favorite joke was: what's the difference between a teacher and a train?
"What bus?"
Kid goes to the kitchen.
Mom: What are you doing here?
Kid: Just checking out the knife.
Mom: So you've chosen death.
