A noose, a knife, a gun, and a razor blade look at a child who committed suicide after being bullied.
Everyone looked at the noose. The noose would say, "What? It wasn't my fault!"
Whats Jokes
The circular saw asked the chainsaw, "When am I as big as you?"
The chainsaw would answer with, "When you cut down some things in your life. Like your owner."
The circular saw would reply with, "What?"
What do orphans do after they win a game?
Nothing, they have no one to play games with.
What's the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant lady?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
What kind of knickers is the best?
Windy knickers, because they're the best kind.
What did one twin tower say to the other? "Be back, I gotta catch a plane."
What do you call a dolphin in the woods? Dead.
What’s a squirrel’s favorite OTT? Nut-Flix.
What's a spider-man’s dream job? Web developer.
What do you call Miles Morales Spider-Man from Europe?
Kilometers Morales.
What do you call a rare fart in Egypt? A toot uncommon!
What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish?
"This tastes a little funny."
What's big, black, and touches children?
Harambe.
What's the similarity between your mum and West Ham?
Your mum blows spunk bubbles from her ass.
What did Omnicron say to Delta?
"Same race, bud, different evolution."
"SIX FEET AWAY, OMNI! SIX FEET AWAY!"
What do you get when you have a class of kids and a speeding car?
A 24 killstreak!
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What did the horses say to the donkeys?
"Jackasses, please like!"
I wanted to bomb a restaurant, so I went in there with a bomb, but the bomb got diffused and did not work.
I asked a person standing nearby. I said, "Hey, do you know how to fix this bomb so I can blow up this place?"
He gave me a book.
It was the Quran.
I said, "What the hell is that?"
He said, "This is the official manual for bomb making."
Day 70 without sex, my doctor asked me, "Are you sexually active?" I said, "Why, what you tryna do?"
