Whats Jokes

What's the difference between a baby and a Dorito?

One is a tasty snack, the other is a Dorito.

What's the difference between onions and babies?

I cry when I cut onions.

One day, I saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" I said, "His parents."

What's a similarity between The Ark of the Covenant, The Holy Grail and a bunch of 12 year olds?

They are all locked in the Priest's basement.

A little girl and a little boy are taking a bath together when the little girl looks down and asks, "What's that?" The little boy says, "That's my little red race car." 10 minutes later, the boy looks down and asks, "What's that?" The little girl says, "That's my little red race car garage."

So later that night the boy asks the little girl if he can put his little red race car in her little red race car garage. She says yes, and they pull down their pants and the boy tries putting his little red race car in her garage, but it won't fit. Downstairs, the mother hears an ear-piercing scream and runs upstairs, flips on the lights, and sees blood on the floor. The mother asks, "What happened?" The little girl says, "We tried putting his car in my garage and it wouldn't fit, so I cut the back wheels off."

What do you call an infant with no legs?

Ground beef.

What's the difference between a PC and a 6 year old? I don't have to clean out my PC.

What is a redneck's favorite sock?

A red sock.

What fish sings?

A tuna.

What do you get when you cross an eagle with a lion?

A griffin.

This isn't a joke, just an American back-to-school list.

1. Pencils

2. Binders

3. Paper

4. Pencil sharpener.

What, did you think I was going to make a school shooter joke?

While fucking a hot auntie, pressing tightly her boobs and fondling, He: What do you feed your babies? She: Milk and orange juice. He: Wow, which side is orange juice? 😋

What did the fish say when he got to the dam?

"Dam water."

"Dam!"

What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hoe? A hoe can wash her crack and sell it again.

There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.

One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:

Police: "What’s you name?"

Shut Up: "Shut Up."

Police: "Where's your manners?!"

Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."

What goes "Ooooooo"?

A cow with no lips.

Q: What did the kid say as he tossed a chair to his neighbor's house?

A: You're the chairman of the board!

A man has a terminal illness and isn't sure how long he has left to live, so he talks to his doctor. The man asks, "How long am I going to live?"

The doctor says, "Depends, what time is it?" The doctor then looks at his watch and says, "10".

The man asks, "Ten what?"

Then the doctor keeps going, "6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1".

What instrument do a pair of sheep play? The two-baaaa.

What did the cookie say to the milk?

What’s up duud?