Whats jokes
What is the best part about eating cake? Your mom.
Mom: Go water the plants.
Me: But it’s raining outside.
Mom: Go grab the umbrella.
Me: What???
Q: Two skeletons walk into a bar. What happens?
A: They fall.
(They walked into a BAR, as in a rod or whatnot.)
What do you call a baby kangaroo? Joey.
What do you call a 6 year old named Joey? Supper.
What is killing your friend called?
A homie-side.
What did the pencil say to the other pencil?
Your looking sharp!
What's black and white and red all over????? A zebra in a blender!
What is a retard's favorite race? The grand autismo.
What do you call a crappy circumcision?
A rip-off.
What do you call your son?
An mistake.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a child?
Hot Wheels.
What's a furry's favorite news network?
Fox!
What do you call a deaf child?
-Ryan Simmonite-
What do Jesus and I have in common? Our dads left us...
What do you get when you cross a cow with a fish?
A genetically unstable animal that is impossible and would die instantly upon existing. If it could live, it would be a deformed, parasitic tumor that undulates through people.
What did the substrate say to the active site?
"C'mon baby, we fit together, open my door lock to f**kin' key."
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I have been tripping all day!
You: Say "addicted" after everything I say.
Person: Uh okay.
You: When you're obsessed with candy you are...?
Person: Addicted.
You: When you're obsessed with drugs you are...?
Person: Addicted.
You: What hit you in the face last night?
Person: Addicted... *laughs*
(It's supposed to sound like "A dick did")
What did the skeleton say to the other skeleton? "You're dead to me."