Whats jokes
Jay and Andrew are best friends who are almost alike. The difference between them both is Jay is poor and well... Andrew, on the other hand, is suck-a-dick poor. Let me explain, Jay wakes up in his room, walks to the kitchen, and asks his mom, Lisa (I call her Lisa now, btw), if there is anything to eat. "No, bitch!" she replies, so Jay drinks a glass of milk and goes back to bed.
Now Andrew... wakes up, jumps out of bed, and he's in the kitchen. He sees his mom fixing some food for work after a long hard night of giving her husband blue balls. "Anything left for me, Mother?" Andrew asks. "Sorry, Honey, I have to eat to put food on the table and to get the running again." *so she goes to work, taking her time* Andrew sits by his bedside and says to himself, "Man... I'd suck a dick for some water right now." *his mom storms back after hearing what he had said* "I'll buy you a soda if you do my first customer for me!"
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
What is the leader of the school supplies?
The ruler!
What did one cow say to the other? You are mootiful!
What's the difference between drugs and kids?
I don't sell drugs.
What's the difference between the Titanic and Georgie from "It"?
Georgie floated!
If an orphan were to get a takeaway, what’s the home address?
What's a chairmaker's favorite flavor?
Chair-y.
My girl walks in the room in nude mode and sat on my dick. I said, "What up, your pussy?" She said, "Your dick."
What do you call a cow with no legs?
A cow with no legs.
What do you call a cow with no leg?
You got a black cat.
He was bad luck.
Everyone left you and you committed suicide.
What a CATastrophe!
What do you find up a ghost's nose? A BOOger.
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Vitamin Sea.
What do you call a nut in jail?
A busted nut.
What did John Cena say to Ray Charles?
Hey, man.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye, matey!
Roses are not always red, Violets are violet, not blue. Irises are never red, Petunias can be kinda blue.
What does this tell us 'cept you can't trust a poet to tell the truth.
What is shark's favorite day?
Chewsday.