Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;
Copyright: Cade
A family of 3, a dad, a mom, and a 12 year old son are driving in the car when the dad says, “How about we play a little game of two truths and a lie. It’ll be fun.” “Ok,” the mom and son reply happily. “Let me start,” says the son. “Ok, go ahead,” replies the mom. “I hate video games, I hate school, and I love junk food,” says the son. “Ooh ooh! You do love junk food, you do hate school, and you don’t hate video games.” Says the mom. “Your right!” He replies. “I’ll go next,” says the dad. I love your mom, you’re adopted, and my dad almost died in WWII.” “Hmm... Your dad did not almost die in WWII, obviously I’m not adopted, and you do love my mom.” Says the son. “The lie is the second on.” Says the sad.
What does Donald Trump says when he declares war? Nuke them. What does a pervert says when he declares war? Nude them.
You know when women clean their nails with chemicals no one cares but when hitler tries to clean poland with chemicals everyone goes crazy
Why is the Champs dElysees in Paris lined with trees? Because German soldiers like marching in the shade!
Two of my grandpa's died in ww2 Their tower fell over
What is the difference between an ISIS training camp and a school? Don't ask me, i just fly the drone.
What do you call a kid watching Star Wars by themselves?
Hans Solo.
A war isn’t about who is right, it’s about who is left!
What was Stephen Hawking’s favourite TV show?
Robot Wars.
A man tried to shoot Adolf Hitler but missed. Then Adolf replied, "Oh shoot, I did nazi that coming!"
What do you call the Spanish translation of the 9th star wars movie? Rogue Juan.
Why did they invent glow-in-the-dark condoms? So gay guys can play Star Wars.
What did a gay Indian use as a weapons of war? A rain-bow
why was the roman soldier kicked out of the army- because he was romin around during war
When Kim jong-un said nuke the chinese, he meant put the take away in the oven. Some simple misunderstandings start a war.
Why was Hitler bad at math?
He could only count to nein.
Why did the Star Wars movies come out in the sequence 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3? -- Because in charge of sequence, Yoda was.
How did the octopus go to the war?
Well armed.
