
War jokes
The twin towers were the best soldiers ever. Stand together, fall together!
What's a suicide bomber's biggest fear?
Dying alone.
A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine, and he said to her...
"Hey, baby, we should bang sometime!"
Why is America so bad at Clash of Clans? Because we already lost two towers.
It's not a hate crime if you don't hate the person.
It's not a war crime if no one's alive to report it.
You will never see a redneck opposing a war.
He will instead say, "Wait, I get to kill people and it's not illegal? And they're foreigners?"
"If we don’t have a strategy, then the enemy will never know our strategy."
-Sun Tzu, Art of War.
"A foolish man is lactose intolerant. A wise man simply tolerates it."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
"You may not rest, there are monsters nearby."
-Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
"If you can't win, lose."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
"Warning, all unsaved progress will be lost." - Sun Tzu, The Art Of War.
"Remember, switching to your pistol is always faster than reloading."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
"Jesus can turn water into wine, but I can turn your mother into mine."
- Sun Tzu, *The Art of Creating War*
"You cannot win a war without a war."
-Sun Tzu, *The Art Of War*
"If two sides in a battlefield read my book, there will be no winner."
Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
"The naked man fears no pickpocket."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
"It's not a war crime if you win the war."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
"If your enemy is kicking your ass, blame it on the lag."
-- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
Roses are red, violets are blue, the last time people got depressed ended World War II.