Walk jokes
I was walking and I saw a girl crying, and she told me to take her dollhouse and I asked why. She said because I don't have one.
A guy walks with a young boy into the woods. The boy turns to him and says, "Hey mister, it's getting really dark and I'm scared."
The man replies, "How do you think I feel? I have to walk back alone!"
What is better than a paralympic gold medal?
Walking! đđđ
Little Johnny walked into his parents' room to see them going at it.
He asked his mom what they were doing, and she said, "Uh, we're play fighting," and he's like, "With no clothes on?"
She said, "Yeah," and so he said, "Let me join you then..."
Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.
Memes
A lady walked into a bar and ordered their special drink. The bartender then gave her a brown glass full of milk. The lady complained about this, but then the bartender said, "Just shut up and swallow!"
A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.
What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.
How do you get two deaf people from fighting?
Turn off the lights and walk out.
A gay couple walks into a Muslim bar. The tender flares up and says, âlet me guess, a little blood on the rocks?â
What's the difference between a priest and Woody from Toy Story?
Woody goes limp when a kid walks in the room.
A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost. As they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air, and men with spears are there.
One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So, what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we arenât that crazy, so we will let you choose how you die."
The man from France said, "Bring me the poison."
The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun."
And the man from New York said, "Bring me a fork."
The guy was confused with the fork but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, âFor France!â and drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, âLong live the Queen!â and shot himself and died. And the man from New York started stabbing himself with the fork and said, âMAKE A CANOE OUT OF THIS YOU FUCKERS!â
There was a boy who owned a dog, who was walking while wearing headphones.
Upon entering a park, he saw a sign that read, "DOGS MUST HAVE LEAD". He continued into the park, and became immersed in the music.
After leaving the park 20 minutes later and turning around for the first time in a while to remove the lead, the sight of his now-dead, freshly-poisoned dog reminded him of the importance of heteronyms.
So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."
Hitler walks into his meeting room, turns to his trusted staff, and says, âI want you to organize the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten.â
Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. âMein Fuhrer, why do you want to kill a kitten?â
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. âYou see, no one cares about the Jews.â
A random guy yelled at me, "Hey, slut!"
I walked towards him.
"I prefer slit," I said.
"Why?" He asked.
"You see these wrists?" I spat at him.
This guy walks into a library one day and asks the librarian for a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian says, "F*** no, you wonât return it!"
So a girl says to her ex, "I can't get you out of my mind, the boyfriend I knew." The girl replies, "I see you in everything, like when I'm walking down the street, even at work, like trash cans are everywhere."
A boy walks into class with a shirt, pants, underwear, and socks. The teacher says, "Where have you been?" The boy says, "On a peach hill."
Another boy walks in with a shirt, pants, underwear, and socks. The teacher says, "Where have you been?" The boy says, "On a peach hill."
Then a girl walks in, and the teacher says, "And where on earth have you been?" The girl says, "Well, you see..." Then the teacher stops her and says, "Let me guess, on a peach hill?" The girl says, "No, on 2 big cucumbers."
So, one day I was walking home from school with my best friend, Sally. She was worried to get home because she was going to tell her mom that Bob, the class rep, got her pregnant eight months ago, and now it was obvious she was pregnant. So I said, âSally, itâll be okay, Iâm sure sheâll be happy to get a grandson.â âYeah, thanks, Suzy,â she said to me, then went into her house.
The next few weeks she didnât show up to school, so I was like, oh, she must be in trouble with her mom. Iâll go check on her.
So I walk up to her house and her mom answers with a baby boy in her hands. âOh, hello. Is that Sallyâs son?!! Can I see Sally?â Her mom says sure, and I go inside, but she leads me to the backyard and I see a tombstone. âHere lies Sally 2004-2020.â So I ask her mom in tears, âOh, did she not make it through the birth?â And her mom replied, âYou could say that...â
