My friend was feeling low today so I went up to her and said "You know I would hang in there if I was you, swaying through life" I don't think she likes me now
Raaj went up to his mom and said, "I bet you 10 dollars I can disappear." Then he turned off the lights.
God those orphans we're putting up such a fight, I had to lock em in the basement
best friend *hold a sign up that says "what gender are you"* Me:uh male?.. best frend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"* Me: you silly goose *silence for like three sec* Me:still male though-
The parentless child stood as her orphanage was blown up by a kamakazi I had rented
A limbless man sat on the side of a lake everyday. He had no hands or no legs. One day he was crying when a woman was walking by and saw that he was upset, so she asked if he was okay. He replied, "No." The woman said, "Well, what's wrong?" The limbless man said, "I've never been hugged by anyone ever." So the woman, out of kindness, hugged the man. "Are you okay now?" she asked. "No," the man replied. So again the woman asked him what was wrong. He answered, "I've never been kissed before." The woman eagerly gave him a peck on the lips and asked, "Are you okay now?" The man shook his head sadly. The woman asked him what was wrong for the third time. The man said, "I've never been fucked." The woman looked at him, picks him up, throws him in the lake, and says, "Now you are!"
I've been drinking from a tall cup his teeth look like twin towers al-Qaeda Blown him up
A man c@me up to me and threatened me with his milk, cheese, and butter,... how dairy!
I searched up self harm jokes clean but I couldn't find any :[
why did the orphan get arrested for identity theft.
He dressed up as batman for hollow ween.
Why are people surprised by Johnny Depp having $30,000 wine bills, domestic violence accusations, rampant substance abuse, poor hygiene, and the looks of a predator? He grew up a Florida Man, after all.
Why was the baby Dinosaur an orphan?
His family was blown up by meteors
Why do orphans never wake up in the morning? There dad can’t wake them up
Welcome to the X Union. Sign up below the joke here.
My sister’s birthday is on 9-11, when she opened her presents she jumped up with explosion
A man dies and goes to heaven. When he gets there, he sees an angel standing in the center of a room, surrounded by clocks. The man goes over to the angel and says, "What are these clocks for?" The angel looks at him. "These are lie clocks," the angel says, "every time someone lies, it ticks once. Mother Teresa never lied, so hers is at noon, and Honest Abe only lied twice." The man asks, "Where is Bill Clinton's clock?" The angel smiles, then points up at the fan.
I was at work and then a little kid came up to me and she said “what happened to all the parents?” She sounded so confused so i told her “its only yours kid, they left you on purpose” she cried i felt bad for a second and the thought oh well time to back to my job at the orphanage
(amazing pick up line) yoo what if we got matching tattoos u get 2 towers and i get a plane, Bc i crashed right into ur life ;)
Thank you so much for helping me get to 20 followers! I'm so happy, even time I look at my followers going up, it makes me so happy. I can't wait to keep posting other things on here! <3
Teacher- "I'll call your mother" Orphan- "go on, see if she picks up
