Ugliness jokes

Your mom is so fat, when she went to the ugly contest, they said, "No professionals."

Your mom and dad abandoned you because you're too ugly.

You're so ugly, when you put makeup on, it makes you look like a clown.

You are so fat and ugly, Chucky didn't even want to play with you.

You are so ugly, when you were born, your mother asked for a receipt.

Your mama is so ugly, her reflection ran away!

Your mama is so ugly, she doesn't have to flush the toilet. She already scared the shit out of it.

Jack is a ugly meany who’s not going to my birthday!

So I was looking through my pictures and I found a picture of a random kid that took a picture of his ugly face. It looked like someone that got hit by a car, then a bus, then a semi.

That’s what I get for not having a password on my iPad.

Enemy: You know, I saw you walking down the street, and at first glance, I thought you were a fat and ugly bitch.

Me: Strange... Who puts a mirror in the middle of the street?

Yo mama so ugly, she the real reason all the dodos died.

1st graders: Ay yo girl, I think you’re beautiful, let’s get married!!

2nd graders: Uhh, don’t tell my mom that we’re dating!! She won’t let me date! Let’s keep this a seeeeecret heeheehee.

3rd graders: Uh, my teacher told me to stay after school because I wrote a poem about you and I’m 9 years old, we have to break up, sweetie.

4th graders: Hey, I think you’re cute!! Wanna date? I don’t think my girlfriend will mind.......

5th graders (they start wearing makeup): Ay girl, your eyelashes are pretty, I like you now, wanna date? Here’s my numberrrrrr.

6th graders: Heyyyyy, I gotta tell you a secret, I got a crush on you!! Don’t tell anyone!! Byeee, ooh, I’ll text you later!

7th graders: We need to make Peyton jealous because she broke up with you!! Wanna date? I mean, you’re not hot, but still, great personalityyyyy, alright, bye now.

8th graders: Hi sweetheart, I got STARRRBUCKKKSSS

Me: UGLY AF AND LITERALLY NO BOYFRIEND.....

A man told his love interest she looked beautiful.

And then his love interest told him she had loads of things to tell him.

And after 3 minutes, she told him he looked fat, ugly, disgusting, creepy, and tiny.

Then the police came and arrested her for saying that.

"Dez nuts, bell suck and she ugly."

Just to get things straight, I'm NOT, I repeat, NOT racist, but this joke goes out to all the people who talk about other people with darker skin than the other person.

Bully: Your skin is so black and ugly (for the 5th time).

Me: I'm so happy you love my skin color!

Bully: Ew, no I don't!

Me: Then why do you keep talking about it?

I’m back and have a joke my friend said!

Person 1: My brother's Halloween costume is so ugly.

Person 2: What was it?

Person 1: He went as himself.

You are so ugly, when you went to a haunted house, you came back with a job application.

You are so ugly when you gave birth to your baby, you gave it carpet burn.

If you looked in the mirror, you would see an ugly person, which is you.

Yo mama is so ugly that even Donald Trump couldn't be inside her dreams.