Ugliness jokes

A girl called me ugly.

So I drove over her with a car and called her flat.

Yo mama so ugly, Bloody Mary handed her an application through the mirror.

Luigi was dying and had two sons. Bruno was handsome, but Alberto was ugly.

He said, "Maria, tell me, is Alberto my son?"

"Yes, Luigi," his wife said, and he died happily.

Wife said, "Thank God he didn’t ask about the other one!"

You're so ugly your mom and dad abandoned you, and you went to the adoption center, and not even the adoption center would take you or let you in.

When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."

I want your weight, not your phone number.

The police gave you a fine for not fixing your ugly hairline.

Tyler is ugly.

If you are called Tyler, change your name.

Your mama is so ugly.

The Buddhist monks broke their vow of silence.

You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"

You're so ugly that I choked and died.

What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.

Yo momma is so ugly, she gets rejected by dead people.

This is not a joke, nor did I come up with it.

If somebody calls you ugly, just hug them and say, "Life must be hard for you since you have visual impairment!"

You're so ugly your hairline ran away!

Your mom is so ugly she made a blind kid cry.

You're so ugly when a pig saw you, he said, "Yes, my brother is back."

Yo hairline so ugly even Bob the Builder said he couldn't fix it.

His hairline is so ugly that Martin Luther King had a dream about it.

Your hairline is so ugly, it's stretching down to Bikini Bottom.