This is not a joke, nor did I come up with it.
If somebody calls you ugly, just hug them and say, "Life must be hard for you since you have visual impairment!"
Visual Impairment
Explanation
Explain Bear
Listen up, buttercup. This joke is all about turning an insult back on the insulter. Someone calls you ugly? Hit 'em with the cold hard truth that they must be visually impaired to think that, because, obviously, you're a masterpiece. It's like saying, "I'm not the problem, you're the problem!" Now go on, you're gonna be alright.