Type jokes
What did the hematologist say when his Canadian patient wrote that he's blood type "eh"? "Ah, probably just go with blood typo!"
What is an obese lady's blood type?
Nutella.
Did you know all Canadians have the same blood type?
They all have blood "eh."
Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar...
"GET OUT OF HERE!!!" The Bartender shouts, "We don't serve your type!"
The first windmill said to the second, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The second windmill said, "I'm a big metal fan!"
What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination?
HAAAAAANNNNDDDDEEEEEEYYYYEEEEEE!
Yo momma so ugly, her blood type is puss.
What is the best type of bath bomb?
A toaster.
[God creating sharks]
God: Ok give them 3 rows of teeth.
Angel: Seems excessive but ok.
God: And make them mean as hell.
Angel: WTF y.
God: BECAUSSE I SAID SO.
Angel:...
God: And make one of the types have a hammer for a head.
Angel: Why do I still work for you?
God: Because I’m the only employer as of right now.
What type of flour do you buy an orphan? Self-raising.
My cousin died last week. He needed a blood transfusion, but we didn't know his blood type. He just kept saying, "B positive, B positive," but it's hard to be positive with him gone.
Q: What type of mother gives their daughter sperm? A: A furry mother.
What type of jam can you not eat?
Traffic jam.
What type of bees give milk?
Boob-bees.
One day I was just sitting around when my butthole began to grow larger. It grew and grew and began to engulf the other parts of my body until it swallowed them all. Now I am just a big butthole typing this. Please help me!
There's two types of emo people:
1. People that cut side to side.
2. And people that cut up and down.
The most efficient is up and down.
What type of file do you need to turn a 14 centimeter hole into a 40 centimeter hole?
A pedophile.
What type of comedy can't Steven Hawking do?
Stand-up comedy.
What is the best type of snake?
A dead one.
What's a lesbian's favorite type of food?
Finger-food.