Two jokes
There's two reasons guys will hang themselves from the neck.
One is to escape the worthless masquerade of a life we pretend we have, and the second reason is to whack off.
Why are the two friends like the Twin Towers?
They fell apart.
Q: What do you call a blonde with only two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
I got these two people in my class we call them Twin Towers, so when I heard about it I threw a paper airplane at them.
Two people wanted pepperoni pizza... Sadly, they got planes.
Memes
Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale?
They already lost two towers.
The doctor said I had two years to live, so I shot him. The warden gave me 50. Problem solved!
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and the Leaning Tower of Pizza?
One held its balance, the other two fell.
Two gays are getting ready for Christmas... They are expecting a big package in the mail!
What has 4 legs and two gloves?
All five people on my baseball team. ⚾️
Yo, dad is so stupid, he brought the milk after two years, and he said, "Oh, sorry son. I'm going back to the store. Bye."
Two air vents walked into a bar.
The third one ducted.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie with Batman?
Two family reunions!
You can play Jenga in two places now: New York and Miami (Chaplin Towers.) They probably have Jenga tournaments there every year.
I saw an ad that said, "By the time this ad is over, two identities would have been stolen." So, I did what I had to do and skipped the ad! You're welcome to the two people's identities I saved!
How do you ride two bikes at once?
You ride them in tandem!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters?
Anna one, Anna two!
This guy goes to the doctor and says, “I think I’m a wigwam, no, I think I’m a teepee, no, I must be a wigwam, no, a teepee.”
The doctor tells him, “I think I understand your problem. You’re two tents.”
I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless.
Two fish in a bowl. First fish asks, "Haven't I seen you around here before?"
The second fish replies, "F**k me, a talking fish!"