Twin jokes
Me and my brother were called the twin towers. My brother lived up to his title after the plane crash.
Who reads the fastest?
The pilot of the plane who hit one of the twin towers. He took out 83 stories in one go.
The greatest bond you will ever have is the one with your conjoined twin.
In America, planes hit the Twin Towers. In Soviet Russia, Twin Towers hit planes.
Did you know the people in the twin towers were great readers?
Yeah, they went through 80 stories in seconds.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an ugly girl? The Twin Towers at least got fucked.
Why are the twin towers mad?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plain.
Who are the fastest readers of all time?
People who jumped out of the Twin Towers. Why? Because they went through 13 stories within 5 seconds.
Osama Spin Laden, dropping beats like the twin towers.
What did the lawyer name his twins?
COURTney and CASEy.
What is the difference between McDonald's and 9/11?
McDonald's has a drive-through. Twin Towers has a fly-through.
Why were the Twin Towers knocked over? Chuck Norris was leaning on one of them.
What is a terrorist's DJ name?
Osama Spin Laden.
Dropping beats like the Twin Towers.
What do you call an obese man with bipolar? Twins.
The twin towers are like genders, there used to be two of them.
What do you call all down syndromes?
Twins.
My friend texted me and asked me, "Hey. What's your favorite emoji?"
I said, "😬😬😬😬😬😬😬"
She said, "Why?"
I said, "'Cause it's your twin."
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal." The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
Louis Day is Steven Hawkins' identical twin.
Yo mama so ugly that when she was born, the doctor looked at her face, then at her butt and said, "Twins!"