Transportation jokes
How do bees get to school?
They go on a school buzz.
To people who say that depression hits hard...
The car begs to disagree.
Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road.
So I asked him, “What’s the word on the street?”
What is green and looks like a school bus?
A school bus.
What's the difference between the Barracuda car and a fish?
The fish can't go fast.
Why are supercars so super? Because it is superfast, lol.
I would have loved to ride the Titanic at least once ;)
iykyk
What motorway lane does Stephen Hawking use?
Hard shoulder.
My friend walked down the street and peed on a car.
A penis is driving a car when all of a sudden it gets hit by a car, what did the penis end up saying?
Aaaawwwww I got dicklash!
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
'Cause it got knocked down on its way.
What is yellow and does not float well?
A school bus.
There were four people in a helicopter: Trump, a first-grade kid, a schoolteacher, and the Chinese leader.
There were only three parachutes. The Chinese leader takes one and jumps. The schoolteacher says she has to teach, so she jumps. Trump and the first-grader are left. Trump says, "I've lived my life; you take the last one." So the kid puts on his backpack and jumps. Trump makes it out safe.
What do you call an idiot who walks on the road when cars are coming?
Fresh roadkill.
What is the difference between a plane and a helicopter?
A plane hits a building, but a helicopter hits the floor.
Student: There are 505 rocks in a car. If 8 fall out, how many are left?
Teacher: There will be 497 rocks left.
Student: Ok!!
Student: How do you put an alligator in a closet?
Teacher: You can't, it won't fit.
Student: No!! Just open the door, put the alligator in, then close the door.
Teacher: Ohhh, now I get it.
The 1645 service has been cancelled and has been replaced by a replacement bus service.
EasyJet would like to apologise to all of those who are travelling to Greece.
What did the bus driver say to the lady with one leg?
Hop on.
What do you call a train that likes toffee?
A chew-chew train.
What goes boo in a car with no lips?