Transportation jokes
What did the cat say when he took his new car for a test drive?
"Meoooow!"
You can get the park in the park with you if I have park in your car, and I will be there in a couple of hours. Would you be able to pick them out at your house, and I will pick you up, and I will be at your place at your convenience. I can get them in a little while. I’m at the park. Bye.
Why did the suicidal man walk in front of the car? To get to the other side.
If you're serious, congratulations on getting this far in life with absolutely no comprehension of reality.
If you had this kind of knowledge about driving a car, you'd be sitting 30 feet away from it, throwing pieces of pickles at a barn and shouting ‘shazam’ into an empty iPhone case, wondering why the car wasn't moving.
Why did the black guy cross the street to check King Van?
What is the difference between a wagon filled with sand and a wagon filled with newborns?
You cannot unload the sand with a pitchfork.
What do you call a bruised banana?
A school bus full of his kids.
Me dozing off while driving.
Everyone else on the passenger plane: September 11, 2001.
Q: What do you call a chip that goes fast?
A: A rocket chip.
So, my kid took my car. He crashed it off a bridge. I miss it, but it's going to have my car.
When I die, I want to go peacefully in my sleep like my grandpa did, not screaming and shouting like his passengers.
What’s got 4 wheels, does a barrel roll, and goes from green to red in seconds?
Kermit in a car crash.
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
You can't use a pitchfork to get the bowling ball out of the truck.
Why did the gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken’s foot.
What happened to the dog that crossed the road?
A flock of swallows were migrating south as a jet flew past them.
"Why was that one flying so fast?" asked one. Another answers, "Can't you see his tail is burning?"
This isn't a joke, I repeat, this is not a joke. The plane in Lake Harriet is not in the lake. It is invisible because of the satellite pic, so there's no plane in Lake Harriet.
What's yellow and can't swim? A bus full of kids.
Your uncle Jack is stuck on a horse.
Would you help your uncle "Jack" off the horse?
My grandpa lost his toe today. 😔
Nvm, we found it. It's in his TOEtruck.