Transportation jokes
I can’t take credit for this joke; it’s not mine.
Remember that time Joe Biden fell off his bike? He said it’s not his fault. He blamed the tires for being too inflated.
Why was the computer late for work?
He had a hard drive.
Everyone always has a special person in their life someday, but I think yours got ran over by a bus.
Your mother is responsible for all the train drivers that are never ever late. She taught them all to pull out on time.
Are you a highway? Because I wanna lay on you.
Are you a train because I want to get railed by you? ;)
What was Hitler's favorite part of the car? The gas tank.
Why does Zac say he works at McDonald's? Because Aaron go errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Patient number 14 was diagnosed with stage 4 melanoma—a type of skin cancer. Pretty ironic how he travels. He went to terminal 14.
"You are stupid. You can’t even ride a baby pony!"
I lost my job by giving up my seat to someone.
I didn't know you're not supposed to do that if you're a bus driver!
Gays are always welcome on my Redneck Party Bus. NOT!
I can't tell what's farther, the Great Wall of China, or how far Paul Walker flew out of his windshield.
Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone?
He got hit by a train.
The potholes so big in Oklahoma Can make a whole garden.
Roads be so rough in Oklahoma, I saw a high lifted truck get ended riding lower than a Hot Wheels car.
Aren't paraplegics just plegics who can fly?
Why is my plane delayed?
Because someone hit the Sears Tower.
What is the difference between the subway guy and a priest?
The subway guy didn’t get away with it...
(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today?
(Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka.
(Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well, I quit!
(Kid) Quit what?
(Bus Driver) Living.
(Kid) But it was a joke!
(Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die, but you will still be alive.
(Kid) Ok.
(Bus Driver) That was a joke, too!