Worst Jokes Ever
What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.
What flies around the school at night?
Alpha-bats!
A Story:
I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heard scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police, but it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass, I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again, but this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby, certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.
Sequel follows...
I'm not saying you're stupid.
But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"
How do rabbits travel?
By hareplane.
Your forehead is so big I could use it to get free TV.
Yo mama's so fat, she invented double doors!
Yo mama so fat, she needs two watches for each timezone.
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Malaysian Airlines Flight 303!
What does a gorilla attorney study?
The law of the jungle.
What do they feed a gorilla in Paris?
Ape Suzettes.
Why do homeless people commit crimes?
They get a bed in jail.
A guy stuffed some cigarettes up his eyes thinking it would make him see colors.
The next day, he could see only one color... black.
What do you call a bee that produces milk? Booby.
Why is it bad to high five an emo?
They will leave themselves hanging.
Two friends are arguing and one friend says, "Jason Warhis is not afraid of water and not ifs, ands, or buts about it."
And the other friend says, "Butt he is."
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no balls to do it.
You can't call yourself a baby boomer if you have never detonated an infant.
Why did the orphan become a criminal?
Because he wanted to actually be wanted.
I was reading a book about an immortal dog, it was impossible to put down.