Worst Jokes Ever
How many Karens does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one...to call 911 and demand a cop come do something about the intimidating blackness.
Kobe Bryant jokes just don't really fly well now.
What is the difference between beer nuts and deer nuts? Well, beer nuts are 49 cents, but deer nuts are just under a buck. (If you don’t understand the genders of deer, you won’t understand it.)
I'm not saying I hate you, but if you got hit by a bus, I'd be driving that bus.
I took my girlfriend out the other day... Man, do I love being a sniper.
Dating a stripper is like eating a bag of chips in class.
Everyone looks at you in disgust, but deep down inside they want some too.
My grandfather said we rely on technology too much, so I unplugged his life support. Luckily, I remember his last words: "You little bastard!"
Don't let an extra chromosome get you down!
The worst part about church is that you're constantly switching between sitting, standing, and kneeling. I mean, why can't the priest just pick a position and f**k me already!
What do Michael Jackson and the Captain from the Spongebob theme song have in common? They both say "are you ready kids?"
6:30 is the best time on a clock... hands down.
What did one traffic light say to the other?
"Stop looking, I am changing."
What did Hitler and Usain Bolt have in common?
They both finished the races.
Chuck Norris wins a staring contest. -- Against Medusa.
What do you call a dwarf police officer?
A guinea pig.
What's the difference between a knife and my life?
A knife has a point.
When I saw a girl sitting on the ground crying, I asked her where her parents were. She cried louder. That’s why I like to volunteer in an orphanage.
New Teslas don't come with a new car smell; they come with an Elon Musk.
When Steven Hawking realizes heaven is only a stairway away.
How do you know when a woman is going to have a black baby?
When she takes the tampon out, all the cotton is picked.