Worst Jokes Ever
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw 'em.
"Zre, um, be careful when using a gun, okay? And meh not fat, boy."
What are two things you could call a fart?
"Gas from the ass" or "Odor from the motor!"
Why did the tomato blush?
Answer: Because it saw the salad dressing.
During Covid, lockdown went on for so long that even the agoraphobics got cabin fever.
What is a rabbit's favorite drink? Hare wine.
Where do rabbits sleep?
In the junkyard outside.
The other day this duck came by the gas station. He asked the cashier, "Do you have any duck food here?"
The cashier said, "Hell naw, I got no damn duck food. This the gas station, not no damn swamp, and I ain't ya mama."
Then the duck asked him two more times, and then the cashier said, "For the last time, no, I don't have any duck food here for you, ok? If you ask me again, I will put you in the oven and deep-fry you like Kentucky Fried Chicken."
"Little John, she is fat." How? He said, "Like a pig."
Why did the person take crayons to the bedroom?
To draw the curtains.
Why couldn't the teddy bear finish his dessert?
He was stuffed.
What did the snowman ⛄️ eat after dinner?
Ice cream 🍨.
Yo mamma is so dumb, she will watch Disney Junior all night long.
Hi 👋 I have some good idea 💡. What was the best game I’ve [played]?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
You.
You who?
Don't you get it? You're the joke, dumbass!
"Fuck" and "sex" are hot, which is fire.
What time is it when a rooster sits on a fence? Morning.
What time is it when an elephant sits on a fence? Time to get a new fence.
What time is it when a lawyer sits on the fence? Time for an elephant to sit on the fence.
My sister beat me in a race. She gave me a raspberry. I was bitter.
Why is an orphan good at being naughty?
Because they don't have no one to tell them off.
The man walks into a bar, reaches into his pocket, and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player. The piano player starts playing the piano. The guy next to him asks where he got that. The man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes.
So the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside. He says to the genie, "I want a million bucks." The genie snaps his fingers, and a million ducks appear in the road. The man comes back inside and says, "Hey, that genie is a little hard of hearing." The man says, "Well, did you really think I'd ask for a 12-inch pianist?"