Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the cow smell?
'Cause the horse gave it a pat on the back.
Wanna hear a joke?
Your face.
What’s another name for nutting in a woman?
Loading the dishwasher.
Wow, that is so sunny!
Q: What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A: Lickalotofpuss.
Yeetus.
What do 100,000 battered women have in common? The bitch was wrong!
Three cowboys are at a fire talking about the best things they have done.
Cowboy 1 says, "I have taken out a whole group of raiders with my bare hands."
Cowboy 2 says, "I have killed a herd of bulls with my thumb."
Cowboy 3 chuckles as he mixes the fire with his dick.
One night I was sitting on my bed in my room, minding my own business. It was pretty late, around 10 PM. The glow of my laptop screen was the only light in the room. I heard a noise coming from behind me. It sounded like the door was opening, but there was no one else in the house.
I turned around and found Mr. Incredible standing in my doorway, a stern look on his face. He walked over to me, slowly and dramatically. Then he leaned over and pointed his finger at my face, only about two inches away now. I was frozen with my back against the wall. Then, Mr. Incredible said something I would never forget: "Stop pirating video games."
Ever since that day, I have never gone on a pirating website and have paid legally for my video games. True story.
What do you call a fantastic goat?
Goatastic! So funny please like.
Why did the pedophile cross the road?
Because there was a school on the other side.
My sister has cows, and after 4 months, she said there was a mis-steak.
Rowan
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lickalotopuss
Why don't they put petals on wheelchairs so when our arms get tired, we just use our legs?
When you say to your dad...
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
Dad be like...
Who wants my son?
Nan be like, "Me!"
Kid be like...
AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH GIVE ME #### ROUX!
What are roux, says nan?
Um, they're your life savings!
Nan be like, "Let's get some roux!"
Why did Bob fall? Because gravity was mad at him.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
To get to a mattress store!
Why did Mimi cross the road?
She had cancer.
A man sees a woman. He falls in love with her. Little did he know she had AIDS.