Worst Jokes Ever
How do pigs kill themselves?
They commit Kermit-cide.
Why are people born in December, January, and February easy to get along with?
They're cool and chill.
Do you ever look at someone and think, "You must have been conceived at a family reunion"?
Why was 10 scared? Because of 9/11.
Q. What do Canadian women and Canadian beer have in common? A. They're both stronger than they look.
ISIS recently brought out their own shampoo: HEAD AND SOLDIERS.
When we take a family photo, you are the background.
It's a shame Iran doesn't know how to restrain Israel. If only they had Hitler's expertise.
Now he really would be THE FINAL SOLUTION!
I was lying on the living room carpet the other day with my girlfriend on top of me in wings and a tutu, making out.
I called her the Fallen Angel.
I said, "Are you half left or half right?"
"Neither! In-between."
"What?! In between your mom's tits when you go to sleep with her at night?"
Women should be seen and not heard.
But how would you control that if she was screaming "NO!!!" in the bedroom?
Who wants a spot of bukkake for bedtime?
I was literally cradlesnatched as a child.
Yeah, in the arms of an older woman experiencing my first rounds of motorboating.
I like it when your mom keeps on top of things.
(Male fantasy)
Yeah, on top of me on the living room carpet, snogging my face off.
Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.
I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.
Once you've had the mother,
Don't tell me you've never been tempted to do the daughter.
I got knob cheesed after your sexy mom was on top, dry humping me on the vanilla-coloured living room carpet.
Like a work film, to take new in the center.
More good, Tar de Spring is the mill Murray Hurlowar Skelett Dwight Dowl - for its general help!
It's a Italy day outside the fields.
What is the best time to eat dinner?
When you're hungry.