Worst Jokes Ever

Tushar’s Fortnite skills.

What is the difference between a blond and a Nazi?

The blond survived.

Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar...

"GET OUT OF HERE!!!" The Bartender shouts, "We don't serve your type!"

Your cow is so ugly, it scared the crap out of the toilet!

How many cats are in the human body?

None, unless you're Asian.

Guy #1 is being picked up by Guy #2 from the hospital.

Guy #1: Oh man, I just got my prostate checked. It's not looking good.

Guy #2: Why, what is it?

Guy #1: Turns out, I have prostate cancer.

Guy #2: Oh man that sucks...

Guy #1: Yeah, it's a real pain in the ass!

What is black and at the top of the stairs?

Stephen Hawking's after a fire.

A father and son duo are sitting at a table, eating breakfast. The father looks at the child and says, "I'm hungry." The child looks at the father and replies, "Hi Hungry, I'm Son." The father calls his father and asks why he was named Hungry.

Why did Stephen Hawking die?

His wife forgot to plug his wheelchair into the wall.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that's just been raped.

What is a "dad?"

What is the difference between a banana and a helicopter? Neither of them is a police officer.

A kid walks into the classroom on time.

He told me that he was in a wheelchair, and I asked, "Oh, wheely?"

Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.

How do you find a redneck virgin?

Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.

What do you get if you cross a pig and a witch with sand?

A ham sandwich.

What's the best part of not wearing a condom when I'm with my girlfriend? My mom went through menopause.

Why does Trump always ensure he has a second pair of pants with him every weekend?

In case he gets a hole in one.

My "overweight" friend and I were talking at lunch.

Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly, dude?

Me: *annoyed* Jason, when you stepped on the scale this morning, it asked for your weight, not your phone number.