Worst Jokes Ever
What kind of tea is hard to swallow?
Reality.
Yo mama so fat, she fell off both sides of the bed!
Why don’t orphans work as computer repair technicians? Because they can’t find the motherboard.
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.
Why doesn't the Sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees.
What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? You don't get something in return if you give money to a church.
What is italian sausage?
The dick of a gay italian.
Mom: Wake up!
Me: No, I'm too disappointed and I have a headache...
Mom: Why are you disappointed?
Me: I took 12 random pills and I still woke up...
Me: tries to scan self at Walmart. I can't scan myself, wanna know why?
Alfred: Why?
Me: because I'm worthless... =)
Why does a married heterosexual man want an anonymous blowjob at a glory hole inside an adult bookstore?
Because he doesn't want his wife to find out that he got a blowjob from another man.
What do physically handicapped gay men do after they are done belching? They wipe their mouths on their light blue handkerchiefs after they are done sucking cocks.
Tomorrow is Christmas, and I'm giving myself a present that I can't wait to open. It's my wrist. (Yes, this was inspired by a Fall Out Boy song.)
A man asked his girlfriend what she wanted to eat one night, and she said "Chinese food," so he took her to China. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Indian," so he took her to India. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Nothin'," so he took her to Africa.
What is Bill Cosby's favorite poem? Roses are red, my cum is blue, I'll wait till your asleep to rape you.
What do Hostess Twinkies and the cock of a gay man have in common?
🐓 🐓 🐓 🐓 🐓 🐓 🍦 🍦 🍦 🍦 🍦 🍦 🍨 🍨 🍨 🍨
I crashed into those motherfuckers! 😂😂😂
The ones you hate most are also the ones who are by your side most.
How do you avoid getting raped? Just don't say no!
It's only rape.
If she finds out.
To be the perfect German, you need to be as thin as Göring, as tall as Goebbels, and as blonde as Hitler.