A teacher asked his students a math question.
"You have one dollar. Your parents give you five dollars. How much money do you have?"
After some thinking, about half the class raised their hands. The teacher called on a little girl in the front.
"One dollar!" she said.
Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the bar? Because she heard the drinks were on the house.
A man asked his girlfriend what she wanted to eat one night, and she said "Chinese food," so he took her to China. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Indian," so he took her to India. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Nothin'," so he took her to Africa.
How does Hellen Keller drive?
With one hand on the wheel and the other on the road.
I told my mum the refrigerator was running, so she got dressed and ran after it...
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, "This isn't working." I'm not sure what she's talking about. I opened the fridge door and it's working fine!
Toto is at school and asks if he can go to the bathroom. The teacher says no.
Then, she asks Toto, “Where is the biggest river in the world?”
“Under my bench,” he replies.
Q: What did Donald Trump say after America gave him the boot?
A: What am I supposed to do with one boot?
A cannibal went to the dietitian, and he got told to eat more vegetables, so he ate a disabled person.
