I have a friend named Mole.
She plays a game called "sandbox" to dig up dirt...
Worst Jokes Ever
When your wife gets pregnant and you don't want a kid, just come on down to Momma Mia's Pizzeria and abortion clinic!
Once there were three Indians. Two were smart and one was... not so smart.
One day, the first smart Indian went out hunting. He came back with a dead deer. The not so smart Indian asks "How'd you do it?"
The smart one replies, "I followed the deer tracks, shot the deer, and brought it home."
The next day, the next smart Indian goes out. He comes back with a dead bear. The not so smart Indian asks once again "How'd you do it?"
The smart one replies, "I followed the bear tracks, shot the bear, and brought it home."
Finally, it's now the not so smart Indian's turn to go hunt. Multiple hours had passed since he left. The smart Indians go out to search for him. They finally find him, bloodied and on the verge of dying. The smart Indians exclaimed "WHAT HAPPENED!"
The not so smart Indian replies,
"Well I... I followed the train tracks, an... and shot th- the train... bu- but it kept going..."
I help suicidal people.
BTW verb not adjective.
You wanna hear a joke?
You.
Why is your mom's butt so smelly? Cause she wipes poorly.
FRIEND: Hey, want to come to my house?
LONELY ORPHAN/TRUMP: Want to come to my orphange?
FRIEND: Dude, I'm blocking you!
LONELY ORPHAN: :(
A man walks in a bar. Ouchie!
Roses are red, My cat try to kill your next >:)
Why did the Indian man refuse to use deodorant? Because he wanted to smell like his natural habitat, the shitter.
Math riddle: If I have 12 bottles of wine in one hand, and 9 in the other, what do I have?
Your hairline is as nonexistent as your dad.
Here is a story, my best friend was Chinese, his name was Chong-king. I took him to a restaurant one day and he said, "I am Chong-king." I said I know your name is Chong-king, within a few minutes he just randomly died making weird noises and turning blue by every second.
Anyone know what happened?
Why are orphans so bad at football?
assssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
Tesco's slogan is "Every little helps."
Well, their bag did a wonderful job on suffocating my wife.
Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!
Yo mama is so fat that when she jumps, the earth was shaking!
Why don't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
What borders on stupidity?
Scotland and the EU.