Worst Jokes Ever
Yo body so plastic that a turtle could choke on your peeled skin!
Why are orphans bad at Yahtzee?
Because they don't know what a full house is :(
Michael J. Fox walks into an ice cream parlor.
The man behind the counter asks Michael, "Can I help you?"
Michael exclaims, "I would like an ice cream."
The man behind the counter asks, "What flavor?"
Michael says, "It doesn't matter what flavor, I'm gonna fucken drop it anyway."
What's the difference between a blowjob and cough syrup?
They can both give you relief and make you gag at the same time.
Yo mama so fat that the weighing scale said, "To be continued..."
True fact: School shooters aren’t dangerous to you if you're the school shooter.
What’s 23 times 2?
A potato.
Yep, if someone says to you, "I can't roast trash," say, "Well, some trash is used for recycling, and that is why you have a baby brother!"
A man walks into his bedroom where his wife is carrying a sheep under her arm and says, "This is the pig I've been fucking."
Wife says, "That's not a pig; that's a sheep, dumbass."
Husband says, "I was talking to the sheep."
Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!
Is it still called beef if two vegetarians are arguing?
What do emos do when they meet up?
They hang out.
"If you yeet one thing that has been yoted, the yeet gods will help you" - Chris Tyson, MrBeast's friend, and your mom >:)
Your head was mistaken for a chicken wing.
Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:
Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.
Her: Really? What?
Me: Sweet-in-low.
Her: Why?
Me: Because you're artificial.
Roads be so rough in Oklahoma, I saw a high lifted truck get ended riding lower than a Hot Wheels car.
Why can't you say hi to a drug addict?
They'll say "yea."
I was thinking of starting up a stair company, but there were too many steps to it.
Memories: I have ligma.
Ligma what?
Ligma balls.
I told my friend you should definitely quit smoking, but he could not find me because he was already up in flames.