When I was younger,I thought that it was cool to use knives because kids used to ask me to use them,by the way,have you see my sister??

1.Your face is so ugly i thought it was deformed it probably was anyways 2.even if donald trump had time to build a wall it was probably so you won’t squish us with you fatass. if someone says your face is deformed just say thats what happens when i look at you. welcome

Enemy: You know, I saw you walking down the street and at first glance, I thought you were a fat and ugly bitch Me: Strange…Who puts a mirror in the middle of the street?

Bitch: Nice eyes brows

Me: Yeah wears yours motherfucker

Bitch: (Realizing she shaved them off cause she thoughts it would look cool)

yo mama so stupid, that she thought NASA is a GAMING PROGRAM!!!

me: says to kid at adoption center you adopted me and kid: hug

thought this sight needed a little bit of nice jokes

So this women had a job she wanted to hang out with her boyfriend the she lied about having corona virus then she got out of work then she was texting her boss when she thought she was texting her boyfriend then she said i lied now we can you no water sigh lick sigh then her boss texted Ew and YOUR FIRED. one more story one day this teen named alexis got kicked out of a house then went to live with her bf then she got pregnant posted it all on social media

My wife was going to have a abortion and I have cancer Ha Ha Ha

I thought it was funny

Superman was flying one day when he saw Wonder Woman laying by the pool completely naked, he thought “I can fuck her so fast she wouldn’t even know what happened” so he then flew down to the pool and did fuck her. Wonder Woman stood up and said “What was that?” the Invisible man said “I don’t know but my asshole stinks”

yo mama so stupid she thought a donut was dough shaped like a nut

Two mates walk into a bar Mate 1 : Shit! look at that spider over there Mate 2 : Whateverrrrrrr Mate 1 : No, seriously it’s bloody massive Mate 2 : (Turns around) Shit thats huge, I thought you were Joking Mate 1 : No I’m Fred King, Jo King’s brother ;-)

i thought i told u the lock up when i left this morning this is why our shit gets stolen all the time

There was a man in a tower and the other man thought it was a girl so he said let Down your long hair and he said ok I will let my big super long harry penis down for you to climb and suck then the other man said if you have such a long dick suck it yourself se ya bith

so i walked into this bar, and thought, “wow. this is a dull joke.”

i don’t like jokes.

what did the porg say to the porg? Hi Porg

youre on worst jokes ever, you thought I put up a good joke? HAHAHAH!

I was at my boyfriends house and I thought he was cheating on me and he was on the phone with somebody he said he’d be over there soon. so i asked him if I could see his phone he said no and then we fought about until I seen his gun and because I thought he was lying to me I shot him,went through his phone and his friend was still on the phone.

Why do people say cheese when they are taking a photo?

Because they were using the computer and thought about it.

person with wheelchair makes a joke * no one laughs*

inner thought * wheely Manerva wheely*

What Did One Astronaut Say To The Other Astronaut After Landing On The Moon? Ah! And People Thought We Were MO ONS!

I went to the market to get eggs,and my sister thought that i meant my Balls