2 men ran into a bar, you would have thought after the first one hit it the second one would have seen it
Somebody told me chemistry joke. I thought it was sodium funny, I slapped my neon that one.
About the guy who gave Stevie Wonder a cheese grater.... He thought it was the most violent book he'd ever read....
Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says “what’s the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks? “ The man says “it’s not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place.”
One day a man was fixing a car, an he accidentally got brake oil in his mouth. He was about to spit it out, but then he thought, "hmm, this tastes pretty good!" So he would keep drinking brake oil. But his friends were getting worried about him, and they were like "dude, this can't be healthy." But he said "Don't worry. I can STOP anytime."
What was the last thought Jesus had before he died?
"Man, I could really use a crowbar right about now."
Three men walk into a bar.. you would have thought the last one would have ducked
You’re forehead so big when you were being born the doctors thought you had no face
My friends mother thought a kid who had autism and downsyndrome. He called him a “double down”
I was in math class and we were learning geometry. My teacher said PENTAGON then all of a sudden PENALDO burst into the room! He thought we were talking about PENS so he came looking for some because he's a finished pen merchant! Shame on you Penaldo for ruining my education 🤬 !
A little girl was sitting with some other kids, she thought to herself, I want to have kids when Im older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!🤣🤣
When someone saw your hairline they thought it was a dorito logo
I know what you did with your mom last night, the orphan nah jit trippin you thought i had one
You know that at Walmart they have backpacks next to the guns? Well I thought that it was nice to see the bags next to the school supplies.