When a Muslim dies he gets 72 virgins. It's the same thing with priests except the virgins are children.
Going in a military The last thing I heard from them is:"Goodbye"
whats a cows favrite thing q:a mooooovie
A mom and her son are taking a walk when they pass a homeless man fapping. The boy asks, "What is that man doing?" The mom says, "Making pizza," trying to turn him away.
The son sees a dog fucking another dog and he asks the same thing. She says, "Making extra cheese." When they pass a window and see a couple doing it, he asks the same thing. She says, "Ordering the pizza."
Later that day, the mother says to the father, "I think I want to order some pizza with extra cheese tonight, don't know why that sounds good."
So that night, the husband who was watching tv yelled up the stairs, "Wanna order some pizza!?"
The mother replied, "DON'T WORRY I'M MAKING SOME!"
The son's voice followed, "I'M ADDING EXTRA CHEESE!"
I don't have much motivation for things that's why i haven't yet killed myself hehe
Pope francis "What is the hardest thing about nailing a young boy to a cross ?"
"My penis"
What do will from stranger things and the fresh prince of belair have is common there both named will and there lives both got flipped turned upside down
A man told his love interest she looked beautiful. And then his love interest told him she had loads of things to tell him. And after 3 minutes, she told him he looked fat, ugly, disgusting, creepy, and tiny. Then the police came and arrested her for saying that.
According to all known laws of aviation,
there is no way a bee should be able to fly.
Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.
The bee, of course, flies anyway
because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.
Barry! Breakfast is ready!
Ooming!
Hang on a second.
Hello?
- Barry? - Adam?
- Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.
Looking sharp.
Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.
Sorry. I'm excited.
Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.
A perfect report card, all B's.
Very proud.
Ma! I got a thing going here.
- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!
Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!
Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Well, pull yourself together, then.
Doctor, doctor! My brother's crazy! He thinks he's a chicken. Is he egging around? Yes, but we need to get the eggs.
Woman: Doctor, doctor! I keep thinking I'm an elephant! Doctor: Run around the room. Then the woman stomps around the room and breaks things.
Doctor, doctor! I fell like a bell! Shall I ring you, then? When can you ring me up?
Doctor, doctor! I have a ball stuck in my throat! Shall I bat it and get a run, then?
The last thing I told my ex after we broke up was, "At least we're still cousins!" 😂
What is the scariest thing you'll ever see in your life? James Charles thinking he has rights.
What’s one thing that gay person scared at? A gay guy that’s straight!
"What's 9 + 10?" "21" (lol XD)
Also: "My name Jeff" (Roar XD)
One more thing: Ninga has ligma
What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield? It's butt.
Q:what's the hardest thing about losing your virginity A:making sure she doesn't wake up
Girl: Come Over. Orphan: I can’t. Girl: My parents aren’t home ;) Orphan: Just two things I don’t have.
What was the last thing to go through the terrorist's mind? The detonator.
The one thing I love about Steven is he stood up for all of his haters. Just kidding.
Where are average things manafactured? The satisfactory!
