They jokes
Why can't Tottenham open a restaurant? Because they have no silverware.
What is the difference between Madeleine McCann and a submarine?
They are both full of seamen and are at the bottom of the ocean.
Why do girls not have balls?
Because they don’t.
What is the only reason you can hit an orphan and get away with it?
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why are Americans such good chess players?
Because they lost two towers.
POV: me laughing at my friends when they fail a test or tripped on somthing
Why are orphans lucky?
Because they can get in trouble and nobody can tell their parents.
What does a condom and a coffin have in common?
They both still have stiffs, but one is coming and one is going.
A kid and his dad went to the park. The kid accidentally steps on a cockroach.
They go home immediately and dad gets the scissors. Now the kid has some balls to play with.
Why can't an orphan be gay? Because they have no one to call "daddy."
I found a rock at the park. I threw it at some orphans.
What would they do? Go to their family?
Why can’t orphans have Google Homes?
Because they don’t have a home.
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
Why can't orphans score in baseball?
They can't find home.
Why do orphans play baseball because they try to find home?
What’s the difference between someone’s wife and a plate?
They both have to stay in the kitchen.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson were out on a hike. They had been going all day, so they decided to make camp and stay for the night. They both woke up at 3 A.M.
Holmes said, "Look up, Watson, what can you see?"
"Judging from the position of the stars, it looks like it's about 3 A.M."
"What else, Watson?"
"It looks like it will be a beautiful day tomorrow."
"What Else, Watson?"
"What am I supposed to see, Holmes?"
"Elementary my dear Watson, someone stole our tent!"
Brother 2: We have these weird circles on the street! Government is tracking us!!!
Brother 1: They are just to sense cars so they can change lights. And it's the government.
Brother 2: Then why are there two in the left turn lane?
Brother 1: So one car isn't always going left and stopping the others.
Brother 2: Then why are they one car apart? Oh, to have three people going.
Brother 1: Correct. When I see one car on the first, I go on the second so my light changes.
Brother 2: You monster.
Brother 1: I wonder if they trigger by weight?
Brother 2: HA. Yo mama would trigger the sensor.
Brother 1: ARG. It's OUR MAMA you're disrespecting.
Mother (brother 1): What's going on boys? *looks in mirror* HOLY SH@& SHE IS PRETTY!
Brother 2: I think you should take your pills.
Brother 1: Found them.
*imaginary mother and brother fade away*
Thank you ELECTROBOOM for inspiring this joke/sh!t. Go subb to him.
Btw the (1) means it is just imaginary brother one acting like another brother.
Why do orphans only have 362 days of the year?
... bc they don’t have Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, or Thanksgiving.
If you're ever bored, just slap an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?
Why do orphans suck at homework?
Because they don’t have a home.