They jokes
Why didn't they just switch him on and off again, or switch his batteries?
Who are the Fastest Readers in the world?
9/11 victims: They read 87 stories in 10 seconds.
Why do lesbians shop at Sports Authority? Because they don’t like dicks.
Why did the three 23s not go to the orphanage?
Because they already 69'd.
Why was Michael Jackson at Kmart?
He heard they had little boys' pants 1/2 off.
Why are feminists always against men?
Because men can piss with something that they can't: piss with dicks.
Yo mama is so fat, when she wore yellow, the kids thought they missed the bus.
Q: Why are Americans so good at Rubik's cubes?
A: 'Cause they have a history of separating colors.
How do astronauts have a party?
They planet.
Your hairline is receding so hard, they petitioned it to change for the McDonald's logo.
Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?
'Cause they can't elope.
Why did the skeleton die from laughter?
'Cause they broke all his "funny bones!"
What does a woman and a hurricane have in common?
They’re nice and wet at first, but in the end they take everything.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because they ordered three pepperoni pizzas and one came plain, the other came late, and the other one went to the wrong address.
What do / and \ have in common?
They have different results.
Best way to kiss someone is to lick inside their mouth with your tongue a lot of times, and they will really like it, especially me!! - lizard kiss+ french kiss= SloBbY Kiss.
Thanks for learning and getting advice.
Also, don't be such a horny one!
I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very egg-citing, although, I was exaggerating, but, if you think that wasn’t funny to you, then you’re hard-boiled. That’s all for today, yolks! So I said before several cats starting fighting, that sh*t was a catastrophe. These kittens were all like “You’ve gotta be kitten me.” Meanwhile, in the ocean, they just waved, see what I did there? You shore you didn’t? Oh, alright, that’s okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too deep for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had no body. Why didn’t the skeleton ask the girl out? He didn’t have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He boned her. No? Alright. Those didn’t make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.
I got fired from a pickle factory for getting my finger caught in a slicer. They only gave *her* the day off with pay... unfair!
I figure it's ok to hit orphans.
What are they gonna do? Go tell their parents?
Black holes and horny black women have 1 thing in common, they suck everything in sight.