They jokes
Why don’t spiders go back to school?
Because they learn everything on the web.
Michael has canceled his upcoming dates. They were Tommy, age 9, and Bobby, 11.
Why can't all orphans learn about ancient Egypt? Because they don't know what a mummy is.
What's the difference between China and New York City?
In China, the Asians ride ON the trains. In New York City, they usually end up riding UNDER them.
Why does an orphan go to a spelling bee?
So they can spell "home."
They say Jesus walked on water.
That's nothing. Stephen Hawking ran on batteries.
Have you ever tried Ethiopian food?
Because I know they haven't.
How many cops does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they all beat the room for being black.
I was raped by mimes once. They did unspeakable things to me.
Why don't cheetahs say goodbye?
Because they are not going to work.
What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer? The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common? They both used their brains to paint the walls.
The Earth was flat until they buried you.
Why do orphans like belts?
They remind them of their father.
Why can orphans not play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why do orphans not tell when they get hit?
Because who are they gonna tell, their mom?
For being a big company, NASA is openly saying they want pictures of Uranus.
Why do you only see girls in groups of 3, 5, 7, and 9?
Because they can’t even.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
What is something in common with gay people and ambulance trucks?
They both take it out the back and go "woo woo!"
Who are the fastest readers? The people who were in 9/11. They went through 91 stories in 1.2 seconds.