What do astronauts 👩🚀 do when they’re on break?
They eat launch. 🚀🥪
They Jokes
What did one gay guy say to the other when they were packing for a trip?
"Want me to pack your shit?"
Why do cows have hooves and not feet? They lactose.
I was trying to make friends, and this one person came up to me. They said, "Lettuce be friends?" I just laughed and said that was tear-able.
Why do basketball players love cookies so much?
Because they can dunk them!
Why did Mozart kill all his chickens?
Because when he asked them who the best composer was, they all said, "Bach, Bach, Bach!"
How come lepers don't play cards?
Well, if they lose a couple of hands...
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
Q: Why do I like bone jokes so much?
A: Because they are humerus.
You could say Japanese car fans and ancient Egyptians are alike—they both worship Datsun.
In Israel, they don't have Walmarts; they only have Targets.
The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but they were pissed as all they got was plane.
Jack and Jill went up the hill, had some fun, now they have 4 babies.
What’s the difference between a kid with cancer and a dark humor joke?
They never get old.
Why do US suck at chess? We lost both our towers.
Why is England so good at chess? They still have their queen.
Why does Russia suck at chess? They only have pawns.
Why can't you play with a cheetah?
Because they are cheat-ahs!
What do dogs do when they lose their tail?
They go to the retail store.
Got fired from the bank yesterday.
They caught me drinking on the job.
Life has ups and downs, and they had downs.
How do Asians name their babies?
They throw pots and pans around.
"Ching, Chang, Clang!"
