They jokes

What do Michael Jackson and a plastic bag have in common?

They both are plastic and like kids.

Yo mama so ugly,

they won’t give her a vaccine so she can keep wearing her mask.

All orphans must hate the LGBTQIA+ because they are home-o-phobic.

There should be a "kick an orphan" day.

What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Your momma is so old, when she went to the antique store, they wouldn't let her leave.

Why can't orphans be gay?

'Cause they can't call anyone "Daddy."

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana. Jack got high and grabbed her thigh and said, "You know you wanna."

Jill said yes and lifted up her dress. They had some fun.

But silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.

Why is America so bad at Clash Royale? Because they lost 2 towers.

Why are Americans so bad at Clash of Clans? Because they already lost two towers.

At 9/11, the people in the Twin Towers ordered pizza. They asked for pepperoni, but instead got plane.

They say we have a primal sense, that we can just feel when someone is watching us.

It’s been a few weeks, and it's clear that you do not have that sense.

Man, I love telling jokes about orphans. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos.

Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.

The Twin Towers ordered two pepperoni pizzas, but all they got was plane.

Some people put zodiacs on everything.

They said they couldn’t go to the party because of cancer.

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, they just sit in the dark and cry.

What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common?

They both have little boy's pants 1⁄2 off...

When the C.I.A. raided Osama Bin Laden’s house, they found Steam on his computer. This means he was a gamer. He raged a little too hard and went for New York.

Why can’t an orphan play baseball?

They can’t find home.

What do clams do on their birthday? They shell-brate, but they eat all the cake for themselves because they’re shellfish!