They say people are 75% water But I’m 75% an orphan and 25% useless
Why did an orphan say, "I'm wanted?" Because they wanted to feel a lie in their life.
why do orphans only have 363 days in a year? friend :why? me: because they don't have a mother or fathers day
I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.
Q. What do filicide jokes and filicide victims have in common?
A. They never get old.
What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.
Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.
Why shouldn't you make an orphan cry?
Because they won't have a parent to cry to.
Why should you put an orphanage by a cemetery?
So they can always see their parents.
How is toilet paper recycled?
Easier than you would think, but first they have to process the crap out of it.
Little Johnny's neighbor just had a baby. He got invited to dinner with his neighbor. Little Johnny's dad said if he mentioned "ears" he will get a spank.
So Johnny looked in the bassinet. They were talking about the new baby. Johnny's mum said, "What beautiful eyes."
"That is great," said little Johnny, "because he will be stuffed if he needed glasses."
Why do orphans like boomerangs because they actually come back
What do blind kids and orphans have in common? They can see their parents
I walked into an orphanage and asked a kid why are they crying They said: Because I lost my parents I said: lets find them they cried harder so I walked out of the orphanage.
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both shove their meat into 10-year-old buns.
What do my wife and dinner have in common? They are both vegetables.
What do emos and the Lorax have in common?
They both hang with trees.
Why are the people that get your order at restaurants called waiters? They don't wait for the food; we wait for the food. They should be called "note takers." They take notes for food.
Daughter: Mommy?
Mom: Hey.
Daughter: What kind of kids do they use to make Sour Patch Kids?
Mom: They don’t use kids to make Sour Patch Kids.
Daughter: Oh, that’s why the ones I made taste kind of funny...
Why can’t orphans play baseball Cuz they can’t find home base
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
They ordered pepperoni and got plane.
