Thereness jokes
What’s the best part about stage four cancer?
There’s no stage five.
Why can't orphans call their friends?
Because they don't have a home phone!
I went to the dam to take the dam tour, but the dam tour guide told me there wasn't going to be a dam tour that day. So I was thirsty and I wanted some dam water, but the dam man wouldn't give me any dam water, so I told the dam man to keep his dam water.
Your mama's so fat that when she went to space, there was no space left.
Tell me orphan jokes are a really bad joke. People are really orphans, and there is a lot of 'em, and they are all depressed. Who would make fun of depressed people? Well, those dumbass evil people!!
"Knock Knock"
"Who's there?"
"9/11"
"9/11 Who?"
"I thought you'd never forget..."
I didn't ask: ❌
I'm sorry, but it doesn't seem that anyone needed this information, and there doesn't seem to be any chance anyone will need this information in the future. ✔️
I had a huge crush on this girl when I was eight. One recess we met together on the playground, and she brought me to the corner of the playground. That was my first kiss, and from there it got serious. I told my parents a week later and they freaked out, called the police, and they arrested my crush. I miss Mrs. Johnson.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Europe.
Europe who?
No, I'm not.
Did you hear about the cheese factory explosion?
There was nothing left but de-brie.
Q: Knock, knock? Who’s there? A: Boo. A: Boo who? Boo who? Don't cry, it's just a joke!
The more suicidal people there are, the fewer suicidal people there are.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because there would be no home base.
Can an orphan child be arrested for vandalism, or will the officers ask for their parents to talk to?
Chrome turns you into chrome, but there is a chrome back bling, and it does nothing to you.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Peanut. Peanut who? Peanut butter open the door!
So, I know that there are a lot of egg yolks on this website, and I guess I got beat to it, but I'm eggcited to say eggsactly what the eggs say.
I know I'm bad at this, but I hope you will crack up anyway.
There is one rapist among us.
What do lesbians and turtles have in common?
They both eat plastic. (I'm sorry to the lesbians out there; this is a joke, not real.)