Thereness jokes
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Joem.
Joem who?
Joem Ama.
I call this my great talk with Siri.
Me: Hey Siri, give me a "yo mama" joke.
Siri: My mother? Huh?
Me: Did I stutter?
Siri: Interesting question.
Me: It wasn’t a question.
Siri: I’m not sure I understand?
Me: You should understand.
Siri: Hmm... Is there something else I can help with?
Me: No, you b***.
Why do people love dating orphans?
Because they're always home alone.
There was a disabled kid at my door. He said, "I'm selling some cookies, want to buy one?" I said, "Well, if you stand up, sure."
The only thing they can see are their chopsticks.
There was 1 gay guy, who kissed 4576 gay guys. Then had sex with them, creaming so hard, all of the dicks cumming on his face.
Then he stopped and had sex again x6, now he was left with...
Once there was an old lady...
Congratulations, stop bragging!
Being asked for advice after a failed suicide attempt:
"What advice do you have for people out there?"
As a suicide professional, don't try this at home.
So there was a reason why I hated math.
I suck at problem-solving.
Sans: What do you have there?
Frisk: A KNIFE!
Sans: NOO!!!
A girl in my class started barking, and I yelled out, "Furry!" Everyone started laughing at her, and I felt bad. After school, I asked to drive her home, and one the way there I apologized and then told her to count down from 10 - 1. Before she said one, I yelled, "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!" then I jumped out the car.
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa Claus?
They're the ones that make the toys.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
Neither of 'em can see their parents.
There is a country in Africa. It's called Djibouti. It has a crack in it!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Isabell?
Isabell really needs to go on a bicycle.
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
A guy gives labor to a baby girl and a boy twins. The doctor said but the lady was like,
"Ugh, why do I need my husband to be in labor and I want a girl, not a boy, just a girl!"
The lady passed out 😵 and then found out she was in a coma. The man who was in labor died. The two babies got a nanny, an evil one. The nanny killed the babies on their first birthday.
How do Ephippians celebrate their kids' first birthday?
Put a flower on their gravestone.
I went to a store to get milk, but when I got home, there were a million cows waiting for milk, so they killed me.
Mia’s mother has 5 kids: Lilly, Abby, Alexa, Mila, and.... Q: Who is last? A: Mia.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Little old lady. Little old lady who? Little old lady, you don’t need to yodel about it!