There jokes
Why was there peanut butter in the middle of the road?
It went with the traffic jam.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Cash.
Cash who?
No thanks, I prefer walnuts!
Knock, knock? Who's there? A mirror, I'm lonely.
I went to my girlfriend's house one day in Alabama when I met her brother. He said, "Well, I guess there's no more you stuck in the dryer."
When your mom says it will all be ok if you just......... *there is blood on the floor*
How many crack heads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, there is no electricity.
Someone: Didn’t we already meet somewhere?
Me: Yeah. That’s why I don’t go there anymore.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
What’s the best thing about sex with 119 year olds? There are 100 of them.
Where do dogs go when their tails fall off?
To the retail store.
There was a dino at the library today.
It was reading a thesaurus.
What does water see in orphans that they don't? Their parents.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
911.
911 who?
You said you would never forget.
How do cows get their milk? The moo market.
Q. Why did Josh Duggar cross the road?
A. There was a daycare on the other side.
I asked a child where their parents were. They started to cry. I laughed and walked out of an orphanage.
Someone: "I got chickens out there vibin'."
Me: "What? Oh, you mean those over-sized chickens that just show an example of you in real life?"
Someone: . . .
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
What do you call two terrorists standing next to each other with their dicks out?
The Twin Towers.
Little Johnny has no arms. Knock, knock, who's there?
Not Johnny.