Them jokes

Orphan

    • When an orphan is playing baseball, how come the coach doesn't tell them to hit it home?

    He has no home to hit to.

    Punch Line

    • A teenage guy is taking a girl to a dance. First, he goes to buy her flowers, but there’s a really long line at the florist. Finally, he buys them.

    Then, he goes to rent a tux, but there’s a really long line for that, too. After a few hours, he gets the tux.

    That night, he picks up the girl and they go to the school for the dance. There’s a long line to get in that goes halfway around the school. A while later, they finally get in. They dance and talk for a while, then the guy gets thirsty, so he goes over to the table to get punch. There is no punch line.

  • 1

    • Student

    • It was the final examination for an introductory English course at the UW. Like many such freshman courses, it was designed to weed out new students, having over 800 students in the class! The examination was two hours long, and exam booklets were provided. The professor was very strict and told the class that any exam that was not on his desk in exactly two hours would not be accepted and the student would fail.

    1/2 hour into the exam, a student came rushing in and asked the professor for an exam booklet.

    "You’re not going to have time to finish this," the professor said, as he handed the student a booklet.

    "Yes, I will," replied the student. He then took a seat and began writing.

    After two hours, the professor called for the exams, and the students filed up and handed them in. All except the late student, who continued writing.

    1/2 hour later, the last student came up to the professor who was sitting at his desk preparing for his next class. He attempted to put his exam on the stack of exam booklets already there.

    "No, you don’t, I’m not going to accept that. It’s late." The student looked incredulous and angry. "Do you know who I am?"

    "No, as a matter of fact, I don’t," replied the professor with an air of sarcasm in his voice.

    "Do you know who I am?" the student asked again. "No, and I don’t care," replied the professor with an air of superiority.

    "Good," replied the student, who quickly lifted the stack of completed exams, stuffed his in the middle, and ran out of the room.

  • 1
    • Them memes

    Killer

    • A killer gone up to 5 people and killed 4 of them. There were 2 couples and 1 third wheel. The 5th one was left single out...

  • 0

    • Shooting

    • Every kid in a classroom is relevant, because if one of them gets shot, they will all be featured on the news.

  • 0

    • Mama

    • Yo mama so old, I bet she was born when dinosaurs were made, and also she killed them with they breath! 😭😭

    Orphan

    • The orphans all died!!!

    Oh wait, no one cares...

    Their parents are all dead anyway. We are just making them happier. They get to join their parents in hell.

  • 9

    • Man

    • A man walks into the taxidermist with two monkeys. The taxidermist asked if he wanted them mounted. The man said, "No. Shaking hands will be fine."

  • 0