Them jokes

There was a magician on board the Titanic and said that he could make anything disappear.

Once the ship had gone down one of the passengers said to him, "Go on, so what did you do with the ship then?"

Two boys came home for dinner late, and their mother asked, "Where have you boys been?" One of them replied with, "We were all over the neighborhood, we're mailmen now." Their snobby teen sister said, "Well, you're not real mailmen, real mailmen use real letters." Then one of the boys said, "Actually, we used real letters, we found a whole box of them under your bed."

I donโ€™t see why emo kids donโ€™t like to hang around.

I see them hang all day.

Q: What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?

A: One of them gets picked.

A high school student and his best friend were rushing to class after his best friend caused them both to be late. His best friend asked, "Would you like to hear a joke?" "Sure," he replied. "What do you and your sister have in common?" "I don't know." "Because of me you're both late for your next period."

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer.

I donโ€™t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!

My friends were really annoying me at my birthday party, so I decided to pop a balloon to spook them.

Maybe going on a hot air balloon ride wasn't the best idea.

My friend asked me why I know how to tie a noose.

I told them, "because Iโ€™m such a noose-ance."

Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.

Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."

Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______

New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.

Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."

Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.

The bartender looks at them and says, โ€œWhat is this โ€“ a joke?โ€

What are the similarities between a pedophile and a 9/11 plane?

They both came from behind and crushed them.

If a baby cow finds a wolf pup, they will be best friends, but when mummy wolf comes, itโ€™s a fight, so the baby cow and the wolf pup made it a secret, but one day the mummy cow and the mummy wolf found out, but no one got hurt. In fact, the mummy cow and the mummy wolf got to know each other, and baby cow and wolf pup were very happy and played all day long. Their friendship will never break.

-THE END-

This was not a joke but a meaning: if you are different, that doesnโ€™t change who you are and your friends are, so be yourself and donโ€™t let people break your dreams, and donโ€™t forget them either. So no matter who you are, donโ€™t let people change who you are. ๐Ÿบ๐Ÿฎ

Me: Hey, say I am ugly for a billion pounds.

Them: You're ugly.

Me: Sorry, I am not a mirror.