Them jokes
My friend was in Afghanistan when he saw someone got shot, and then they bombed him. Now he called them the "Talkwakers."
How do people get skinny?
Their parents don't feed them. (JOKE)
Why do risky people have cats?
So they have 10 lives with them.
Why can’t balls move? Because no one is there to voice them around.
If you have an emo kid army, they'll kill themselves before they get to the field.
Why are orphans bad at dad jokes?
Because they don't have a dad to tell them.
A teacher asked a class who killed Goliath. The first pupil said he wasn’t the one. The second said he doesn’t know. No one knew in the class.
The teacher got furious and dashed to the Head Master’s office to report. Immediately, the head master followed him back to the class with a cane. He growled- “If no one tells me who killed Goliath in this class, you will see fire!” Everyone in the class insisted on the fact that it wasn’t them.
Then the Head master looked at the teacher and said- “Mr. Dapo, are you sure that the person who killed Goliath is in this class?” The teacher fainted.
Don’t criticize someone until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes.
So, when you criticize them, they won’t be able to hear you from that far away. Plus, you’ll have their shoes.
Why does the military pick orphans as fighter pilots?
Because homing missiles don't work on them.
Hey girl, are your pants a mirror? 'Cause I can see myself in them.
Your mother is responsible for all the train drivers that are never ever late. She taught them all to pull out on time.
How many terrorists does it take to tile a roof?
It depends on how thin you slice them.
My friend is upset with me because I sniffed his grandmother's nickers. Not sure if it was because she was still wearing them or if it was because the whole family was watching. Either way, the rest of her funeral was really awkward.
Sally had 69 boobs, which was 222 many, 69,222. So she went to the doctor on 51st street, 69,222,51, who gave her pills. She took them 8 times a day, and now she is boobless.
What do you call a person with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, you told them twice.
What’s the name of this brand? *picture of puma logo*
Them: Puma
“Puma balls in yo mouth.”
The day I saw people asking Lebron James whether he liked to play basketball, my thoughts be like: wait, so Lebron James is gay cuz he likes to play with them balls.
Nepali people are so fucking racist, like I want them all to be extinct.
The orphans all died!!!
Oh wait, no one cares...
Their parents are all dead anyway. We are just making them happier. They get to join their parents in hell.
Why did McDonald’s kill somebody because they stole the 12-piece nuggets that will never be seen because of them!