Them jokes

My family is like treasure. You need a shovel and a map to find them.

When you get home and see your parents with your grades in their hands.

Twenty minutes later, they're slapping you with the belt.

When your grades get mailed to your house when you expect to get them in school.

When you get home, your mom is there with the belt, going 1k miles per hour.

Three men were lost in the desert and found a genie who granted each of them a wish.

The 1st man wished he was home with his family. The 2nd man wished he was home with his family, and the 3rd man wished they were all back together again.

My elderly relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying, “You’ll be next!”

They soon stopped though, once I started doing the same to them at funerals.

When I see the names of lovers engraved on a tree, I don’t find it cute or romantic. I find it weird how many people take knives with them on dates.

Hey so I like orphan jokes, and some of them are fun, but I think that's engonp.

How to make an orphan's hands hurt: Make them clap their hands till their parents come back.

Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.

Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.

My balls are so purple that I use them as crayons, and I am not talking about the balls you play with. I am talking about the boy balls.