That jokes
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
I got barred from Weight Watchers today.
It wasn't my fault; it was the fat ass next to me who spilled her box of Maltesers onto the floor in the middle of the room. All I did was say that it was the funniest game of Hungry Hungry Hippos that I have ever seen.
Your mama was so fat that she sunk the Titanic!
The professor said, "I think this question raises a few problems."
The student replied, "That is not a question; that is an answer."
Did you know that chips taste like the baked potato in things called bags of chips?
Yo mama is so ugly, if she got a pound for every boy that found her unattractive, boys would find her attractive.
Am I considered a cannibal because I told my mom that Grandma's ashes were sugar?
Prince, I promise you that "qwen" girl you're chatting with is a faker! I am the real lover for you, not her. She's a stranger!
Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.
Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!
A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question can go home."
A boy throws his bag out the window.
The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?"
The boy says, "Me! I’m going home now."
What is a bus driver that does not work? A useless one!
What is a nut that is in outer space?
A broken nut.
You're so fat that when they tried to print a picture of you through the computer, they couldn't fit you in the whole picture because you were so big!
In a thick Russian accent:
"Let's buy some vodka, pollute the earth with oil, and make insecure nuclear power plants that break all the time! Ah, yes. The mother land. A great place to be. Not like those stupid Ukrainian people who are living happy lives, they are crazy and need to die."
Gwen, are you mad at me? Cause that was a faker.
Like the faker Gwen?
I hope death is a girl. That way, it'll never come for me.
Yo mama so fat that when she attempted suicide, she bounced to Area 51.
Went to school today, had to yell at my friend that he wasn't on the clock.
He continued to swing on the pole in front of children.
I saw an orphan take a selfie... oh man, that was one alone family photo.
The Mexican landscaper came to cut our lawn. My mom was happy then asked him, "Can I have some of your burrito?" He said, "Yeah." I said, "Whatever."
A few minutes later, my mom told me to cut the lawn. I said, "Why do I have to do it? That's what he's there for." My mom said, "He's going to do the burrito for me." Then I said, "Okay." I finished cutting the lawn and went in the house. I see my mom giving the landscaper a blow job. I said to my mom, "What are you doing?" My mom said, "What does it look like? I'm having my burrito." The landscaper told me that I missed a spot while cutting the lawn.